- Captain, three or four Pirates
- Setting: On the Bridge (Or Deck of a Ship)
Captain: First Mate! What's 2+2?
1st Mate: Duh! One, Sir!
Captain: Good! Bosun! What's 2+2?
Bosun: Uhh ... let's see ... (Counts on fingers) Uhh ... Five, Sir!
Captain: No problem! Gunner! What's 2+2?
Gunner: Sheesh, Captain! Why give me all the hard ones?
Captain: Great! Cook! What's 2+2?
Cook: Let's see. Two apples and two potatoes makes ... (Thinks) Two apples and two potatoes, Sir!
Captain: Pleased to hear it! You! Floor Scrubber! What's 2+2?
Scrubber: Four, Sir!
Captain: Off with his head! (Cuts off head with sword.)
Servant: Beggin' the Captain's pardon, Sir! I think everyone else got it wrong, but the floor scrubber got it right. Why did you kill him?
Captain: He's too smart! He might go after my job some day!