The Letter Fly
PROPS: Magnifying glass, fly swatter, a bucket containing some bits of paper.
ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen, we are pleased to announce that we have the world-famous specialist on camp flies with us this evening, Professor N. T. Mologist.
HOST: Professor Mologist, it is a great pleasure to have you at camp this evening. l understand you are going to tell us all about the type of flies we find at camp.
PROF: [heavy accent] Vy yess. Virst of all zer iss zee common House Fly. It flies all over zee house and zen lands on your food. Zis is a no good fly, 'cause it leaves cherms. You should swat zem. [runs around circle gently swatting at knees and shoulders]
HOST: Very interesting, Professor, but what about some of the more unusual flies?
PROF: Vell, zere iss zee Horse Fly. You will recognize it because of its little hoofs and long bushy tail. 'Vait, I zink I zee vun over zere. [rushes with magnifying glass to one of the leaders] No, I vas wrong, dot vas a Boss Fly, zey hang around people who gif orders.
HOST: Come now Professor, you can't expect us to believe that flies have personalities?
PROF: No, you don't zink dot is zo? Vell ve will make a test. [selects Patrol Member and has him run around circle] Virst dis fly goes slowly zen it moves its little wings [boy flaps arms]. It is called a Circle Fly. Dis iss a very rare little beast vot always buzzes around leaders vith annoying questions.
CIRCLE FLY: [goes from leader to leader, repeating] When will, how soon, What if ???? [exits]
HOST: Our time is almost up Professor. What other strange fly can you tell us about?
PROF: I alvays tell about dis vun last. It is the Letter Fly.
HOST: The Letter Fly?
PROF: Yes, like vith a bucket of vater, you Let 'er Fly! [runs around circle with bucket flinging bits of paper on all, exits]